It’s so beautiful having people staying in your house and share every day moments with them. I like it because I believe that the every day moments that people share are the moments that really matter and that these little occurrences bring people closer. I don’t feel that the people who share tragic or traumatic events are the ones that bond rather the people that can tolerate each other during their daily routines.Saying that recently I had visitors in my house and I realized that you never really know someone until you live with them .Going out for a coffee or to a bar can not make you realize if you are compatible with someone. Besides people when they go out as they wear their nice clothes wear also their nice behavior. When you don’t wake up with someone in the same house and observe how they are and behave in their daily routines you never know if you can really connect with them. Something that you can realize either when you stay with someone in the same house or if you go for holidays with them. This is a time that friendships can form and friendships can rupture.
I realized that you never know someone until you live with them twice recently. A person that I had really fun with when we went out and started getting closer invited me for holidays with her friends. The holidays because of her behavior became so unbearable that summer that I wanted to take the boat back home. Something similar happened to me during these holidays as I was surprised with the behavior of my cousin when she had to spend a week in my house. The first few days were nice but then her behavior was so bad that I realized that I did not really know her at all. A few days in my house made me realize how she behaves at home and it really shocked me.
As a student I shared my room and the house I live in with friends. The people that I love the most are people that we have shared our routine and have lived together for a while. They are people that you love simply having a coffee with and engaging in conversations around the table. The friends that you love even more because of how they are in their daily lives. In a house where they have left the nice clothes and their social mask and can not avoid revealing who they really are.
(art by annie julie)
14 comments:
Cohabitation sucks most of the time! You have to be really compatible with the other person and both be very respectful towards each other.
And yes, you do get to know the real self of that other person, not always a pleasant experience. As for living with a group of people, it really depends on the relationship(s) and how well people can adapt. I spent two years with two friends and we had a great time. The next year with three other friends and it kinda sucked.
Of course I do not mean to sound as if I like living like a hermit. It is just a fact that living with someone (relationship, friend, family - god forbid! -) takes a lot of work and is quite the eye opener!
Εχω φίλους που περνάω καλά μαζί τους, αλλά δεν κάνουμε για να μένουμε μαζί. Κι έχω και φίλους που περνάμε καλά παντού: και κυρίως όταν μένουμε μαζί. Είναι σημαντικό να γνωρίζεις τις καθημερινές ρουτίνες του άλλου...
Everyone has faces for different situations, and it doesn't mean that those are fake faces. It is also not the only real self that you show in your home. Real self is a combination. On the other hand, people often have peculiar habits in their homes (that is due to the other always constant habitants of the house; this (yours) also shapes your expectations). If you keep living with her, you will surely make a harmony in time. I mostly live alone and I bet no one can endure my peculiarities as they have been shaped in an alone environment.
This reminds me a situation of a friend who was getting well along with his girlfriend even though they didn't spend too much time because they were both busy with their jobs. It only showed up later under diferrent circumstances, when they had to be together in holidays all day and my friend couldn't stand it more than a week.
Also, if the annoying behaviour occures during bad times for a person, would that mean that this is his real self or rather when he as at a good mood? People seem to change, some are maybe predictable, some unpredictable. I would surprise some :P
This has happened to me as well with plenty of my friends. Even with some that were in the category "very very good friends". It's weird but since we have our own personality we must expect surprises by other people.
In November my boyfriend and I decided to live together after 8 years of relationship!!!! I can confess that it's now that I get to know him. Fortunately I realized he is more relaxed and funny in his everyday life in his habitant environment. But it's as if we start our acquaintance from the beginning.
living with others is the hardest compromise one has to make. It is true that the true nature of someone is revealed during his/her most significant yet casual moments. Like the moment he leaves the toilet seat lifted, being inconsiderate of you.
@apotheosis
surely cohabitation is a subject on its own.Staying with someone for a week or going for holidays can be an eye opener.I agree with the god forbid concerning family:)
@sunshine
έτσι ακριβώς όπως τα λές είναι...
@gorgi
Of course real self is a combination but extreme incidents can occur.By living with her I realised that she treated everyone like maids.She did not want to go out even to buy her cigarettes. She had money and she wanted us to pay for all her expenses even clothes. She woke up at 14.00 and her baby at 7.00 and she did not want to look after her baby but expect us to wake up early so she can continue sleeping.And some other things that shocked me.So, living in harmony can be very difficult sometimes. So, some people can really fake behaviours.Its so sad.
@optimus
so so happy that you are back!!!
especially in relationships it is essential to spend time sharing daily routines with your partner.Life is full of surprises.
@ggk
living with someone can bring nice surprises as well.I am so so happy for you!
@dawkinson
I agree with you even though I love spending time with people I have avoided living with a boyfriend so far and I hope that I will be lucky because living with your partner for all your life can be difficult but if he is considerate of your privacy and personal space can be a lot of fun.I am not in a hurry...
Και γω θα΄κεγα πως η συμβίωση με κάποιο άτομο θέλει υπομονή στην αρχή και μετα από καιρό μπορείς να κρίνεις... Πιστεύω πως δεν υπάρχει ούτε μία στο εκατομμύριο να ταιρίαξεις με την πρώτη.. ¨ολοι έχουν τις παραξενιές τους κ από κάποια στιγμή και μετά αγαπάς το άτομο που συμβιώνεις για αυτές ακριβώς τις παραξενιές...
ειναι δυσκολος ο χειρισμος της κοντινης αποστασης μεταξυ ανθρωπων.
βεβαια κανεις δεν μας επιβαλλει τιποτα.
επιλογη.
ετσι δεν ειναι pix;
@narita
γενικά δεν με ενοχλούν εύκολα οι παραξενιές άλλων έχω κατανόηση αλλά όταν φιλοξενείς συγγενείς ή αν είσαι διακοπές και δεν μπορείς να φύγεις είναι δύσκολα.Γενικά ταιριάζω εύκολα και με την πρώτη μιασ και μου αρέσει να μοιράζομαι καθημερινές στιγμές.Η εκπληξη μπορει να είναι θετική ή αρνητική αλλά πιστεύω οτι για να δεθείς και να γνωρίσεις κάποιον πρέπει να περάσεις χρόνο καθημερινότητας για μέρες ή κοινές διακοπές.Τοτε πραγματικά τον/την ανακαλύπτεις...Μάκια
@fuzzy
Nαι fuzz κανείς δεν μας επιβάλλει¨)
Ευτυχώς αποφεύγω τα πρέπει
Well, that is an extreme. Spoiled people are the worst, I must agree.
όταν εγώ πρωτομπήκα φοιτητής έτρεμα στην ιδέα ότι θα συγκατοικήσω... εδώ τσακώθηκα με το γείτονα μου, φαντάσου να έμενα μαζί με κάποιον!
ακόμη και στα ταξίδια με παρέες, όπου μένουμε όλοι μαζί σε σπίτια γνωστών ενώ γενικά δεν έχω κανένα πρόβλημα, είναι μερικοί άνθρωποι που προσπαθούν να επιβάλλουν τους δικούς τους ρυθμούς και δημιουργείται γενικότερο πρόβλημα στην παρέα...
όσον αφορά λοιπόν την διαμονή, μόνη σου λοιπόν pixie μου (η με το αμόρε ;)
Amazing blog!! Congrats!
@storm
Γενικά σε διακοπές είμαι μέσα σε όλα και είμαι χαλαρή.Μου αρέσει όλοι να παιρνάνε καλά αλλά έχω κάνει άσχημες διακοπές με άτομα που καταπιέζουν.
Δεν έχω συγκατοικησει ποτέ με σχέση απο επιλογή.Πάντα χρειαζόμουν το χώρο μου και σίγουρα μια ανεξαρτησία αν τα πράγματα πάνε στραβά.Θα σου ακουστεί περίεργο αλλά θα μείνω με κάποιον όταν θα θέλω να τον παντρευτώ, μια φορα.
@nathalie
thank you sweety and welcome!
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